However, it can get so boring sometimes (naps, school, time with grandparents...) and while I always have chores to do, sometimes you just want to chat wtih someone who gets it. Enter FaceBook! And Bloggy Moms. And playgroups.
Recently I decided that the only way to make new friends is to focus on it. I was told once that you only get what you focus on. It was meant in a business situation but I decided to apply it to my daily life as well. So...I'm actively trying to make new friends. To that end, I have started posting on more pages, joining more groups, and actually being active in them. This really doesn't take as long as you'd think, and it seems to be working. I don't think that people who have an online presence and that you've interacted with that way are really friends though, I like to meet people face to face before I consider them being a friend. That being decided, I joined a local couponig group (I was more excited then you'd think to meet other people who do this, none of my friends get it and that $30 I've saved this month was a full tank of gas!) and I went out, on a night I didn't really want to go out, into a room full of strangers, and spoke to them! I even started talking to people before they spoke to me!! CRAZY!
So then the ground work was laid, but what does that mean? I'll see them every month or so when we have a couponing meeting, but if the information is the same all the time then there's no point in going all the time... So I did the unthinkable, I sent a friend request with a little message explaining who I was and how we had met, and that I was trying to make new friends who lived close and who enjoyed doing some of the things I like so that I could have someone to do them with. I was SO excited when she accepted! I swear I held my breath for the day that it took. I know it sounds silly, but that fear of rejection, even over a computer, can be horrifying.
We have now chatted a few times over the last few days. We have more in common then I thought, and I'm happy to take a time out a couple times a day to fire off a quick message. I sometimes wish I was back in school where making new friends just happened, but I'll put in the work if I get the reward. Besides, at my age you start growing away from old friends sometimes, and it's nice to bridge that gap a little. So I got super brave today and sent another request to another lady I met a few weeks ago. She is a great source of information for the area and I enjoy learning.
I'm not sure that either of these friendships will go anywhere, or that we will meet up often or even once, but at least I have someone to share certain successes with and to share funny anecdotes. It feels good to have friends, new or old, who are in a similar life situation as me. I am growing my network of fellow moms, couponers, and bloggers. I enjoy seeing a new friend has accepted or invited me on bloggy moms, I love seeing a new follower on Twitter, or a new like on FaceBook, it makes me feel accepted and valuable. (Yes, I know my value isn't based on my online friends, but it's nice anyway)
I've also started talking to more moms at activities. School drop off, extracurriculars. It's great when they want to chat back, and value your stories or opinions, and if they don't, then at least I know and I won't waste time wondering.
I really like the excitement of the moment when that friend request is accepted. It's a chance to get to know someone new, to make a friend or not, but to learn about others, your community, and yourself. It opens a door to a world of possibility every time. I hope I don't get hooked on it...